Both my wife’s surgeon, Dr. Shelley Hwang, and her oncologist, Dr. Hope Rugo, are part of the team at UCSF’s Carol Franc Buck Cancer Clinic in San Francisco and have put together a series of videos (Dr. Rugo is also part of Breast Cancer.org’s panel of Medical Experts). The videos are reflective of the care my wife is receiving.
The videos discuss bisphosphonates, Tamoxifen, AI, OS, and DCIS research as well as alternative approaches to care for those who have discovered DCIS.
They are both very interesting or at least can help you in your dialogue with your physician or even your spouse. Sometimes it is hard to communicate to others what is going on and I know I personally found these easier to digest than having an emotional discussion with my own wife and physicians.
One thing you will notice about the demeanor of both physicians is their sense of community with the patient as well as their keen sense for wanting to find both the causes and the cures for this disease. It is my hope they will not only uncover many of the keys to solving breast cancer, but other cancers as well.
Yes, this is a joke! This isn’t a real celebrity sighting by me since I wasn’t there, but through my friend Greg, he brought me , in name only, close to Dina Manzo, the star of VH1’s My Big Fat Fabulous Wedding ($1.15MM) and Bravo’s Real Housewives of New Jersey! Greg happens to be friends with her nephew and niece. I had told him of my fondness of reality TV and the crazy episode where she interviews personal assistants and asks them to wash her hairless cat. He of course went ahead and told her (I thought he was joking) and they took this photo above!
As you know, for me celebrity sightings aren’t about really big celebrities but those who get their fleeting 15 minutes. Some get more. Some get less. Some are honestly real celebrities and some get it for odd reasons. I guess reality TV shows are one of those odd reasons, but I love the guilty pleasures of reality TV because there is “some realisim” there. There are lessons to be translated, motives NOT to be copied or copied, and some compelling personalities.
Of course even these shows are not really reality. That said I did marry a New Jersey girl myself, an Italian one at that. So this show is just an over-the-top view of what marrying an Italian New Jersey girl would be like. I think my wedding cost only $45K and not $1.15 million. You might say I got off cheap! I do have to say this photo is one of my all-time favorite celebrity photos relating to me. Now if she were kissing me and not the napkin, I think my own Italian wife would be feuding New Jersey housewife style! And if you have watched the show, you don’t mess with the Manzos. LOL!
So I’ve been tryin’ ta slow it down
I’ve been tryin’ ta take it in
In this here today, gone tomorrow world we’re livin’ in
– Kenny Chesney’s Don’t Blink
A year has now passed since that day I walked in and found my wife sitting at the kitchen table and she calmly told me that her doctor had found a lump. You would think that will all of this upheaval that this is the year that could have seemed like it would have taken forever but it hasn’t. While it has been filled with surgeries and hardships, we’ve tried to fill it with other events and highlights to mix it up. The journey was tough but before we knew it we were through a surgery, on to recovery, back in to surgery, more recovery, etc. Three surgeries later and we still have at least one more, but we are moving on.
It is hard to move on though, because we have to respect where we’ve been. As part of our 15th anniversary, we spent some time away and took the time to reflect on the past year. You’d think that in a lifetime that this would be a throwaway year and one that you would want to chalk up as one you sweep under the rug and forget, but we agreed that our love grew for each other and our respect for each other and for ourselves grew as well. When your relationship takes a step forward you don’t throw out that year. So while in some ways the scars are still fresh and the dull aches are right there to remind us of what we’ve been through, the year has gone by some immensely fast. We’ve actually have done quite a lot and accomplshed quite a bit. I think it is because we didn’t procrastinate and sweat the little things. We just went for it even if we had to stretch a little further to get there. That said, time might have flown but we must have aged somehow.
I had to laugh this morning when I went to grab one of those Sunday-Saturday pill boxes to take a Centrum cardio pill. My wife told me I was grabbing the wrong one. I was grabbing the PM pill box and not the AM box. Last year we had no pill boxes and now we have one for AM and for PM! We sure get old and become our parents in a hurry! We had just had this conversation with some old classmates at a 30 year grammar school reunion. We were all complaining of aches and pains (everyone looked pretty good quite frankly) and it turns out several of my classmates also had gone through breast cancer recently. At the same time several others were now in their early forties and still having babies. Amazing. early 40s is not too young to be having breast cancer and still not too old to be having babies. Makes you scratch your head.
Meanwhile the beat goes on. My wife is prepping for another follow up surgery at the end of the summer yet stiill undergoing her monthly examinations and her clinical trial. They found some small indications of early osteoperosis but luckily her clinical trial has her taking medication to increase bone density. This is so crazy what they can find these days.
Speaking of aging I spoke with Dr. Ken Dychtwald, the reknowned gerontologist, today. We were talking about the recent rash of celebrity deaths and he reminded me that in previous generations these people would have died 15-20 years earlier but with the extended lifespan we are all enjoying through the miracles of modern medicine and science that instead of deaths happening ‘in threes” we will be seeing deaths in larger groups. “There are just simply going to be more people dying every day,” he said. I nodded and he smiled and continued, “That is why we live life harder every day. The secret to living longer is to live happier!” That coming from a man who gets remarried to his wife every year. to renew his vows.
Dr. Esserman of the Carol Franc Buck Breast Care Center
I thought I’d share this great article that appeared today about Dr. Laura Esserman who is the lead surgeon at the UCSF clinic where my wife goes for her procedures. My wife’s surgeon (S. Hwang) is part of this great group of surgeons who provide a great personal service.
The article also speaks to Jessica Galloway, who we had met through our children’s nursery school when my mother and she were going through chemo together. 5 years later, Jessica would be a great asset for my own wife as she navigated the information and questions associated with breast cancer.
I thought this article just captures the great community and personal excellence needed to get through a very trying time in the lives of breast cancer patients and survivors.
I run from hate
I run from prejudice
I run from pessimists
But I run too late
I run my life
Or is it running me
Run from my past
I run too fast
Or too slow it seems
When lies become the truth
That’s when I run to you
– lyrics from “I Run To You”, by Lady Antebellum
We recently were given tickets and meet and greet passes at the Kenny Chesney Sun City Tour with opening acts, Lady Antebellum, Miranda Lambert and Sugarland (they cancelled). We were lucky to have some time before the show with Lady Antebellum, a trio from Nashville (in the photo Around me from left to right they are Hillary Scott and Charles Kelley). Dave Haywood is not pictured)
Winners of the 2008 ACM New Artists of the year and performers of the recently #1 hit “I Run to You” they are a great group of 20-somethings. Not your traditional country artists, they have a real soulful sound that provides a new sound that has widespread appeal. “I Run to You” is about an expression against hate, prejudice, negativity, and the redemption of love in society. Hey maybe country music is growing on me.
I should add the the trio are a great group of kids and were terrific with our two children, signing autographs and giving them hugs. It was the first concert ever for our kids who were in total awe.
For those who are interested, many new artists give their fans a chance to meet them in Meet and Greets that are made available through a ticket purchase opportunity or via fan clubs, although our tickets came from their management group. Miranda Lambert also had a Meet and Greet arranged before this concert.
“When you get a second chance you never look back” – Sigfredo Sanchez, the father of San Francisco Giants pitcher, Jonathan Sanchez moments after his son pitched a no hitter
Giants pitcher Jonathan Sanchez hugs his father after pitching a no-hitter
…..this isn’t about a basebll no-hitter tonight. It is about a man, a pitcher, his father, and second chances. It is about taking a step back to take a giant leap forward.
We all hear of stories of second chances. Right now, for example, Lance Armstrong is coming back from his second retirement to race in the grueling Tour de France to help bring awareness to cancer. We see how adversity has made him stronger not only physcially, but mentally.
Tonight history was made for the San Francisco Giants as Jonathan Sanchez pitched a no-hitter. As any sports fan can attest when something happens for the team or teams they root for, they will always remember what they were doing. In fact tonight was the first time a Giants pitcher had pitched a no hitter in San Francisco in 34 years. On that day my father took me and some friends to a double header where I saw Ed “Ho-Ho” Halicki pitch a no-hitter against the Mets at Candlestick Park. As I watched tonight’s game, I started thinking about that day with my dad.
It was an incredible twist of fate for Sanchez. He was out of the Giants rotation and was in the doghouse. The newspapers were talking about him being traded. In fact things got so bad that no other teams were willing to trade for him. Now after this evening he is untradeable. How unpredictable was this? Only the fact that former Cy Young winner, Randy Johnson, got injured was Sanchez pitching tonight. The accomplishment was even more surprising given that the Giant’s starting pitching rotation consists of 3 Cy Young winners (Lincecum, Johnson and Zito) and a 4th pitcher who some argue has pitched better than them all (Matt Cain). Sanchez was the forgotten one. He was down on himself, kicked out of the rotation and replaced by a 28 year old rookie. So down was he that his father flew in from Puerto Rico just to give his son some support. It was the first time he had ever seen his son start a Major League Game in his 5 big league seasons. The personal story of Jonathan and his dad played out perfectly. His father fought back his tears as the embraced in the dugout and he told his son the words at the top of this entry. Fate also brought him together with his rookie catcher for the evening, Eli Whiteside, also a great story. The Giants regular catcher was at the hospital with his wife who is expecting, and was told only hours before the game that he would be catching. So it was by chance that this unlikely duo were thrust upon the scene and they will forever be linked. Jonathan Sanchez’s name will go up on a wall in Cooperstown, as the 262nd no-hitter in history.
His father is right, second chances are something we all don’t get much of, but when we do, we need to take advantage of them. Listening to the announcers, Sanchez had consulted for many days with anyone who would listen and worked countless hours on his own to fix his delivery and most of all learn to keep his head in the game. He had some good help. Randy Johnson, pitching coaches, Dave Righetti and assistant pitching coach Mark Gardner had all pitched no-hitters before and given him the mental knowledge. Not only had Sanchez never pitched a major league no hitter before, he had never pitched a complete game or a shutout, never having completed eight innings in a big league game. He got to uncharted waters and finished it.
Back in our daily lives my wife and I sat there and watched the story unfold and talked about how special this evening was for this young man and how his perseverance was something to learn from. When my mother-in-law called the other day, we thought she was calling to wish us a Happy 15th anniversary, she was calling to tell us my father in law is in the hospital fighting an infection with a 102 degree fever. Along with a couple of parents around us dying of cancer, it served a reminder that we are in our second chance right now with recovery from my wife’s cancer. In fact we need to come out better than before. Those with adversity like Jonathan Sanchez and Lance Armstrong seemed stronger because of the level of “fight” they needed in ther bodies. So this week we will be celebrating our second chance with a delayed anniversary celebration.
They say that true sports fans root for the laundry and not for the players themselves. I truly do root for the players. I root for their stories of how they came to be. I root for the human spirit within us all and the events which make that spirit in each one of us burn brighter than before. Jonathan Sanchez represents all that is right. Their individual stories are inspiring in themselves. As my wife saw the events unfold and heard the announcers provide color to the story she started rooting for “Johnny” Sanchez. She wanted his second chance to be successful and I saw she was also rooting for the human spirit. Sanchez , as you might hear Randy Johnson tell you, has just as much talent as anyone on the team which says a lot.
Congratulations to Johnny Sanchez and all the people out there who have had a second chance. They say no-hitters are great timing, great talent, and a little good luck. Well, I think sometimes you have to make your own luck and you have to put yourself in the situation to have good luck. It reminds me of the quote from one of my favorite actors, Gene Hackman, from the movie, “The Replacements” : ” I look at you and I see two men: the man you are and the man you oughtta be. Someday those two men will meet”. Tonight, they met for Jonathan Sanchez.
” Liberty lies in the hearts of men and women; when it dies there, no constitution, no law, no court can save it.”
– Judge Learned Hand
Route 53 at the Fair
4th of July is one of those holidays that has grown on me. I’m not overly patriotic, but with time I’ve become a bit nostalgic about what it means to me and those who do really honor the holiday in its truest form. It isn’t just about those who fought for our freedom and independence in 1776, but those who continue to do so. I’ve never been a big fireworks person either. Seeing the scars on the face of one of my uncles who supposedly got scorched by one when I was a little kid probably cured me of any infatuation a little boy could ever have. It probably didn’t hurt either that visiting my grandmother in San Francisco’s Chinatown where firecrackers were recklessly thrown out of windows on innocent people had once rung my ears to the point I thought I had lost my hearing.
Seven years ago when I joined in partnership with my childhood friend to start a franchise business I would never have imagined myself as someone who would be attending fairs and festivals. To jumpstart our business we became “carnies”. Selling ice cream at art festivals and county fairs. It seemed so gauche. But we did it for a cause. You see, when we started our business we wanted to do something that would give back. We wanted to contribute to the community and that is why we created our business with Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream. Running a small business with a philanthropic business plan to give back to the community was a pretty heady endeavor. We also wanted to do something was fun and that our children would think was cool. Our franchise is based in Marin County, just north of San Francisco and we have spent much of our philanthropic time devoted to youth arts programs, the children’s pediatric ward at the local hospital, and the national headquarters for the Guide Dogs for the Blind. Our San Francisco franchise has been ironically contributing to the UCSF pediatric cancer unit since we took over.
So if you think that selling ice cream doesn’t put smiles on faces, this is one business owner who is proud of what he does. This year as we ran our day at the fair we had a time to reflect on the past several years and felt quite proud of what we’d been able to achieve. We hadn’t made gobs of money, but we had created tons of smiles. That is what America is about isn’t it? Lots of people making others smile?
Ironic isn’t it? My grandfather, who brought our family to the US sold meat scraps from a cart until he established a meat distributorship empire that fed his family. As a butcher, he used to tell me that the most useless part of a cow were its udders and here I am selling a product from those very udders. Of course I have more fund with it. We’ve created this great ice cream eating contest where teams race to eat a bucket of ice cream (Vermonster) and then for kids they race to eat pints of ice cream. It has become an annual spectacle at the local fair. This year the winning team just missed the world record which was set 3 years ago by 0:02 seconds.
Me and the Vermonsters
Me with the County Dairy Princesses
The Moo Crue..a winning effort
Kids Pint Eating Contest
As you can tell we have a lot of fun with this. On a more serious topic though I was really hit by the death of all the celebrities (entertainment, political, sport, etc) over the past fortnight. Forgetting all the media hype, it struck me that this really is a piece of Americana. A politician, an NFL quarterback, a sex symbol, a rock star, a politician, an actor/credit card spokesperson and a guy on a commercial. As I ran tonight, I smiled at the irony. This is truly America and it is funny all of these people were basically sharing the same obituary. This is truly America in a nutshell. Not because they all died close to each other, but it really showed the diversity of interests amongst the American people. Our lives are all so diverse and we celebrate our independence in different ways and worship different icons.
I might not yet celebrate anymore those who gave us our independence over 230 years ago, but I think we should pay our respects to those who celebrated that Independence and gave us memories to last the rest of our lives.
