Tag Archives: breast cancer

35 Months Later – Living with Cancer

July 1, 2011 erikhom@aol.com 4 Comments

Raise breast sawareness

35 months ago my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer. It seemes so long ago but time really flew The care we received from the UCSF Breast Cancer Clinic was unparallelled. This week I came across an article covering the head of the clinic and thought I’d share it with all of you:

by Julian Guthrie for the San Francisco Chronicle:
Surgeon Laura Esserman, head of breast cancer research and treatment at UCSF, has favorite songs she sings to patients as they’re about to go under a general anesthetic. There’s “Don’t You Worry ‘Bout a Thing,” and her all-time favorite, “For Good.”

One of her greatest areas of impact may come through a statewide research project called Athena, which she has spearheaded and will involve the early screening and follow-up for breast cancer of 150,000 women statewide at five UC cancer centers. The University of California initiative has just begun to enroll patients at UCSF.

Q: What are you excited about right now in the cancer field?

A: We started enrolling patients at two of our five centers, with others starting to enroll in July. We have also started doing a comprehensive risk assessment for every woman who comes in for screenings. We are looking at prevention as part of primary care. We are at the beginning of the road in making breast cancer prevention like heart disease prevention. We want to build a new model.

Q: What is the latest recommendation in terms of mammography?

A: If you are under 50, you need to sit down with your provider and ask for your level of risk. What is my breast density? Should I get screened or not screened? If your risk is high, yes, get screened. But again, I think screening has the most significant benefit for women between the ages of 50 and 70.

Q: What are the most important lifestyle changes people can make for breast cancer prevention?

A: If you are postmenopausal and you are overweight, you will have higher levels of estrogen. Through diet and exercise, you can bring that down, which is good for everything, including a sense of well-being. We try to get women to stick to no more than three to four glasses of wine a week, as alcohol is an associated risk factor for breast cancer.

Q: Have you developed a thick skin in delivering the news to women and men that they have breast cancer?

A: I don’t have a thick skin. You can’t. The good news is that there are some people for whom cancer is not that significant, where you can really reassure the person. Of course, it’s very hard if you know someone is in a really bad situation. I face it with them. You can’t just sit back and say this is an academic exercise. This is something that affects their lives – that determines whether their children will grow up and know them.

Q: Where did you grow up, and what did you want to be?

A: I was born in Chicago, and when I was 9 my family moved to Miami. I always wanted either to be a cancer researcher or cancer doctor.

Q: What was your awakening to cancer?

A: Hmm. I read a biography of Madame Curie. I thought what she did was cool.

Q: Where do you live in the city and where are your favorite hangouts?

A: Ashbury Heights. I love to work my way through the Top 100 restaurant list. My son and I were working our way through the cheap eats list.

Q: Secret talents?

A: I love to barbecue anything.

Q: How does working in the midst of cancer, when life becomes more precious, affect you?

A: You never know what’s in store for you. You have to live life to the fullest. I have a great sense of urgency. We need more answers and solutions.

Q: If you weren’t working as a pioneer in the breast cancer field, what would you be doing?

A: Trying to improve the education system. When I cure cancer, I’ll start working on that.

Read more: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2011/06/22/DDS81JRVIS.DTL#ixzz1QpkKfK4H

Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight

The Graston Technique – Breast Cancer Rehabilitation

January 6, 2011 erikhom@aol.com Leave a comment

We often think about the recovery from breast cancer and most often hear about surgery, chemotherapy and radiation. My wife is now 2 years past her surgery. It is easy to look at the rehabilitation and the treatment as trivial but it is a battle. The scars still exist and are a reminder of the trying time we went through. The piles of pills and the monthly shots will continue. The pills will continue for another 3 years and the black and blue bruising elephant shot will go for one more year.

Part of the surgical process most breast cancer victims have involves the use of alloderm which helps regenerate tissue in the recovery process. The result is an intact acellular matrix of natural biological components that promotes rapid revascularization, white cell migration and cell repopulation. The problem with most women is that this results in what is known as rippling caused by the scar tissue. Many women are taught to massage their breasts after the surgery, but this has met with mixed results. Recently the Graston Technique has been introduced. It uses medieval looking tools which vibrate against the skin as it runs over the rippling area.

Please see the attached story and video:

http://abclocal.go.com/kgo/story?section=news/health&id=7879903

The story features both my wife’s therapist, Julie Wong, and my wife’s cancer surgeon Dr. Shelley Hwang.

Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway

Remember or Move On?

October 26, 2010 erikhom@aol.com Leave a comment

This Time's a Charm — This Time's A Charm

It has been a while since I posted here. It doesn’t mean I haven’t been thinking about what to post. I’ve been thinking, but I’ve also been living. Right after my last post, my friend Donald passed after losing his battle with cancer. What do you say when the best fighter loses their fight? I told him once I felt guilty that since my wife was feeling okay that I felt like maybe it was time to move on. I respected people like him, Lance Armstrong and others who continue to raise awareness and also inspire others in such a public way. He told me there is no guilt and no shame.

I’ve always been taught not to forget your past. Don’t forget where you’ve come from. Remember the journey and all the people that helped you along the way. The cancer that my wife had and all the people who helped us won’t be forgotten. They are special people, but when the memory is an unplesant one, it is nice to not have to think about it. As it was my wife’s illness, I think I take her lead. She is moving on and I can tell would rather not talk about it if she can.

The problem is the disease still won’t go away. You can’t escape it. As I mentioned, right after my last post Donald, Wilhelm died, then my wife’s good friend found out she has breast cancer and two more relatives admitted that they have it as well.

So maybe we can’t move on. You can live, but you have to live with those memories and help inspire others. We don’t have to inspire others by helping them directly with their fight. You can help by showing them how to keep moving, keep breathing, keep smiling.

And as a message to Amy, the wife of Donald, you will find your way to move on. Do not feel as though you need to prolong his message. It will always be there……”don’t ever give up.”

Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Business - Affiliate Marketing

Internet Marketing from the Real Experts

February 3, 2010 erikhom@aol.com 1 Comment

Internet Marketing My Shawn Collins and Missy Ward

At our recent Affiliate Summit, the organizers, Shawn Collins and Missy Ward unveiled their new book Internet Marketing From the Real Experts, a compilation of lessons from many of our colleagues in the internet marketing world.

The book has quickly risen into the top 1200 list on Amazon with very little marketing….or should I say traditional marketing. The beauty of a book written about internet marketing is that it will likely be marketed well by those who wrote it. In fact, the Gang of 88, as the contributing writers are called, are all marketing the book in their own way in blogs, on Facebook, on Twitter, etc. Shawn and Missy also gave an incentive by giving all people who wrote a review online a silver pass to their next Affiliate Summit in New York in August.

The book is a quick read and for those of us in the business many of the “3 minute anecdotes” might seem trivial but for someone just entering the game and wanting some quick reference points will find this book to be a good useful starting point. While I found myself shaking my head at some passages I also found myself nodding my head at others. There are probably sections I might never read, but that is why the book was written this way.

The book is written so that you can skip around and find the parts relevant to you. Want thoughts on Twitter and Social Media? There is a chapter. Want to know about SEO and SEM? Video? There are sections dedicated to those topics as well. The articles are based upon the writings from the first 7 issues of the of their magazine Feed Front. Some might look at the title and say, “experts”? Well maybe the writers aren’t experts, but they are real people in the industry who do the dayd to day work. Thay aren’t professors or pontificators, but really the people on the affiliate line on a daily basis.

I could go on and on, but I don’t want to reveal too much about the book because I think those interested should purchase the book themselves. Still not sure if this book is for you and perhaps would like a reason to purchase a marketing book? At $14.93 on Amazon the book is a bargain, but not just for the knowledge gained, but because all proceeds from the sale of the book go to benefit and help the Fight Against Breast Cancer, a cause near and dear to the hearts of the authors and those in the industry.

While at the Summit I kiddingly asked Shawn to sign the copy included in my bag. He laughed and I told him I wasn’t kidding. Admittedly he was more distracted by the football game on the screen in front of him as his beloved Jets were playing in the playoffs.

I didn’t read what he wrote until returned home. Hmmmmm, looks like I might have to write something for Feed Front to be included in the next edition. Perhaps the ongoing struggle of running affiliate programs within larger corporations.

Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Celebrity Sightings, Route 53 - Life is A Highway

A Brand New Day – Breast Cancer Awareness Month

October 9, 2009 erikhom@aol.com Leave a comment

Been a bit since I posted thoughts here. A lot has been going on in life so it is good to capture these thoughts now. I have been inundated with life events that have put me in a very pensive mood about what where I’ve been, where I am and where I am going in life. After these last two weeks, today is defintiely a Brand New Day.

When I arrived home yesterday I saw the biggest smile on my wife’s face. To be welcomed by a big kiss a day after coming home to find that I lost a close relative to a heart attack was definitely a good pick me up. This may be the beginning of a brand new day on our journey with cancer. My wife’s joy was from her follow up post-op appointment with her surgeon. I think her doctors were also relieved to see her smiling as well as she said that they all gave her big hugs. Yes, my wife was her usual “chatty Cathy” self again, and that meant all was really well. It just dawned on me that it had been over 18 months since I had seen that excitement on her face. I had missed her “text” message in which she had told me how happy she was. She had been in good spirits, mind you, but this was just different. Some say our journey of survivorship is over, but I think when we look back it has only just begun.

One of the things that I didn’t know would affect me so much is the way Breast Cancer Awareness has grown so much. Last year when my wife was just starting her battle we might have missed all of the action, but this year we both seem to be more aware of how powerful a movement Breast Cancer Awareness month really is. I felt like every week there was a walk or run for breast cancer and I did notice a lot of products in the grocery store when purchased gave back to some breast cancer research fund.

Ingrid Michaelson sang for Breast Cancer at Slide

For example, Ingrid Michaelson, pictured above, sang at a local club last night here in San Francisco with proceed donations at the door going to Breast Cancer Organizations in the Bay Area. The song “Be Okay” has become a feature song in the fight against breast cancer. She was also part of the Hotel Cafe Tour last year in which the album, Winter Songs, gave $.50 for each sale to breast cancer research.

SF 49er Cheerleaders wear pink tops for breast cancer

This past weekend, all of the NFL paid homage to breast cancer and its survivors. At the 49er game, donations were taken at the gate, referees wore pink, cheerleaders wore pink and players wore pink. Before the game, 50 breast cancer survivors were introduced to the players. One of the captains, 49ers QB, Shaun Hill, who wore pink cleats during the game, met with the survivors. He was later quoted as saying how he had put on the pink cleats without thinking. He didn’t know anyone with breast cancer, but when he met these women and saw the spirit in their eyes he said it suddenly became real to him and the shoes meant something. He said it even rattled him a bit before the game started.

Zach Johnson, PGA Tour Pro, sports pink ribbon at President's Cup

And just yesterday I was at the President’s Cup. Nothing formal was done around Breast Cancer Awareness but a couple of the US players, notably Phil Mickelson and Master’s Champion, Zach Johnson, wore pink ribbons. Phil’s wife Amy, a native of Northern California, is currently battling breast cancer. What was readily apparent was that Phil made a point of saying hello and stopping for a second to speak with every person who wore a notably pink cap or ribbon to stop and sign an autograph. Several elderly women who wore Susan G. Komen shirts were startled as he stopped to say hello and give them each a hug. It didn’t go unnoticed by me or any of the thousands of spectators who saw this connection and warmth he exhibited especially when compared to other golfers who whisked right by the crowd without any kind of acknowledgement to the screaming fans.

So what does this mean? To me it is just the sign of how powerful a community of similarity around a single cause can be. I wish the same thing could be done around heart disease. Just like the push for a mammogram, perhaps everyone should get an EKG. With the obese population we have and the number of people who die of heart attacks each year, why shouldn’t we all get one. I probably need one and my cousin who passed away in his early 50s in his sleep earlier this week could have used one. I bet his 3 teenage children and wife wish that he could have had one.

My son with the NFL ref sporting pink wristbands and ribbon

These events when they hit so close to home just make me think more about my life in so many ways. What was the last thing I did with my cousin? Gave him a High-5 and a hug at the 49ers home opener. How good does that make me feel? It helps me feel like my peace with my cousin is there. It reminded me that when you see someone make sure you leave a good impression with them until you see them again and to remember that smile until the next time you see them. My cousin and his wife and family are models to me of where I will be in 10 years. I can’t help but see that in 10 years I don’t want my heart to fail on my own children and leave them fatherless as they just get started with their lives. It is sad though. My cousin was my 10 year barometer in life. His death to me is a kick start to remind myself to do as much as I can to spend quality time with my children and really make sure they know me and my wishes for them. My life is an open book to them. No secrets. My fears and hopes and dreams are there for them to inspect.

My cousin and his wife were the first people we told on my father’s side of the family when my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer last year and they were the first to help out. My wife and I are beside ourselves about how lucky and fortunate we are to be winning the battle against breast cancer a year later at the same time we are seeing people who seemed so healthy leave us behind. There is no rhyme or reason it seems.

NFL All-Pro LB Patrick Willis sports his pink gloves and cleats

Finally, my son’s classmate’s dad finally lost his battle with pancreatic cancer earlier this week as well. Yes I feel like signs of my life area ll around me. Watching another dad with similar age children leave behind a wife to take care of a 10 and 7 year old is just so sad. When first diagnosed he told me how his main goal was to fight the cancer as long as he could but he knew he couldn’t win in the long run and thus his other goal was to impart enough of his thoughts on life to his two sons so that they’d have something to guide them. Watching the 10 year old this week, his father did a good job in preparing him for the inevitable day. Sad that it has to be at such a young age though for such a good kid.

So where do I go from here? As I said, it’s a brand new day. We can only go forward, live life to it’s fullest and make sure we taste every experience we can get and share it with everyone in such a way that we have an impact on those who might have to be reminded or forget the power of the human spirit.

Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway

Another Milestone of Thanks on 9/9/9

September 10, 2009 erikhom@aol.com 2 Comments

“I won’t give up if you don’t give up” – Train from “Calling All Angels”

I want to give a big thank you to all friends, family and business associates who helped my family deal with my wife’s illness this past year.

Today was just another day of running around the house getting the kids out of bed, reminding them to put their clothes away, brush their teeth, comb their hair and rushing them out the door to school. Hundreds of thousands of families repeated that same ritual this morning without batting an eye. Kids waving at me in my rear view mirror as I drove off to work just put that smile on my face that puts one in a happy place. These small things we take for granted, but I’ve learned to cherish these moments which are the strong fibers in the fabric of our lives.

Midway through the day I was running through my emails, my Facebook updates, and my Tweets as I ate my lunch and someone wished me a “Happy 9/9/09”. The date in slightly different formats had two meanings for me. Exactly 10 years ago my wife went into labor with our first child. The hospitals were then packed on 9/9/99 with tech geeks in the area wanting to have their babies on that day. Incidentally my wife didn’t eventually give birth until 9/11 which gave my son an equally auspicious birthday.

More recently, the date marked exactly a year since I spent one of the longest days in my life at the hospital as my wife went through a 6 hour surgery to have her cancer removed. As I responded to a few emails including one from the mother of my son’s classmate (her husband is dying of cancer) I could only think once again of how fortunate we are. I can only say thank you so many times to the wonderful friends who supported us physically with meals, carpools, rehab walks, babysitting, and even just a nice cup of coffee as well as emotionally with advice, cards, flowers, and prayers through a very tough time. All of those efforts allowed us to get back to the living our normal every day lives without hardly skipping a beat. A big thanks also goes out to all our new friends who met as we entered into this new community in our lives who helped us better understand what we would be going through and prepared us for the months of hard work. Even more to those old friends I grew up with who gave their unconditional support even though we hadn’t seen each other in decades and barely knew my wife.

Why the video in this post? “Calling All Angels” by Train is one of those songs that has been in my iPod for years and was listened to occasionally, but this past year it kept pushing me through some of my long night runs (over 1100 miles since the night of that surgery), inspiring me to keep going until it became a big part of my mantra run. I felt like I was running the streets of San Francisco calling for angels to help and they did. Incidentally, Train is coming out with a new album called “Save me San Francisco” (the band was formed here) and their hit song, Hey Soul Sister, is a catchy little tune that I think captures the energy of the sisterhood of women suffering from breast cancer. The fight against breast cancer is an intense one wrought with emotion. The sisterhood is strong. The women I met as I searched for answers showed me how a strong community atmosphere can be so supportive. The song also captures for me my love for the woman who has been both my hope and my inspiration over the last year.

Well when I got home tonight all I could do was give my wife a big hug. The date had hit her in the middle of the day too. We smiled as our kids wondered why mommy and daddy were so happy that they had to give each other a big embrace in the kitchen. We just told them we are just very very lucky people. Only a year gone by and the ability to look back and smile and turn our heads to the future is a good thing.

Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway

Some Mondays Don’t Go as Planned – A Loving Fight

August 25, 2009 erikhom@aol.com Leave a comment

“It Ain’t Over til It’s Over” – Yogi Berra

Gifts from our UCSF Decision Services group

As I start this entry we are waiting for the nurses as my wife waits on what we hope will be her final surgery, almost a year to the date of her original breast cancer surgery.

This summer has been a rough one with my father-in-law in the hospital on the opposite coast for 6 weeks fighting a staph infection that laid him up with severe back pains and a high fever which made him hallucinate. Trying to entertain kids on their annul summer visit while juggling a couple hours in the hospital each day was not a fun chore for my wife. On top of that her longtime neighbor and family friend died of lung cancer while we were visiting. My wife loves going home to visit friends and family, but this time despite the pending birth of our new nephew, I think she was happy to get back home. She hadn’t even gotten the chance to mention that she was about to undergo her 4th surgery in a year.

Four surgeries in a year is not a badge of honor and at the same time it is not even close to the amount of surgeries many people have gone through with breast cancer, but looking back on it I still wouldn’t wish it on anyone. A total of 22 hours in surgeries so far and the 4th only expected to be 90 minutes and I can only imagine the toll all the anaesthesia takes on the brain. Maybe its old age but I can already sense some memory issues with my wife. She’s been through a lot and I have all the respect for her approach to this last one.

This morning our kids were cranky about having to get up early and were giving my wife a hard time. It really didn’t make me feel good to have to pull each of them aside and remind them how lucky we are. For two young kids who have had nothing but cancer and hospital visits all around them for the last two years, they instantly knew this was not the time to be acting up and realized how fortunate to have what they have.

(Move ahead 15 hours)

Well my wife had a bit of a temperature today and they didn’t want to operate on her for fear she might be getting sick and there could be a resulting infection. They knew my wife and I would be disappointed when they broke the news. We had waited 4 months for this date, but now have to wait more. After such a hard morning getting there it was a bit disheartening. I could see my wife was bothered. I was bothered too. A little for me and a lot for her. Tonight I just felt I had to apologize as I think she could tell I was not happy with the delay as well. We just want to get all of this overwith. One last surgery we hope. Now the wait again. A wait for another surgery date.

We can’t be angry though. My wife and I tried to console each other and subtly reminded each other of how lucky we are to be where we are today. It hasn’t been easy and this wasn’t going to end easy either. We’d been patient this far and couldn’t take this personally. It is so easy to lose your cool when you can taste that chance of moving to the next step. What’s a few more months…heck we still have to wait a few more years to be considered cancer (and Tamoxifen) free. The cancer clinic itself has been great. Just a couple weeks ago during her pre-op appointment they gave her a framed article from the Wall St. Journal that she had helped with (she took photos with the physicians) as well as a huge bouquet of flowers. They really care for her well-being and would rather err on the side of conservatism. Getting to know people on a first name basis makes things so much easier on the patient. I remember seeing them having to look at the charts to remember my wife’s diagnosis and name. Unfortunately they know it real well now, but that sterile feeling of being “just another breast cancer statistic” is gone. Being able to ask your sugreon about their kids and how they are liking their new school just helps to ease the tension.

On a side note, our son’s classmate’s father who was given only a few weeks at the beginning of the summer is still holding on. He is weaker now, but he really wants to see his kids start the school year. It will help them and I think he will make it to that goal. It is really sad, but in a small way having their sons back in school with such a supporting community will make the eventual loss not as lonely. Just last year this happened with another schoolmate when they lost their mother after her six year battle and the school rallied to make meals all year long. I had a chance to see the father at the pool this summer and he said it had been a long year but it taught him about patience and forgiveness with his two young boys. They had lived with this cancer with their mother for 6 years and he said the highs and lows were rough. This year was very numbing without her. Knowing that my wife was in a similar situation, he just put his hand on my back and let me know I could talk whenever I needed.

Yep. Patience. Practice before and after. Take one step at a time. There is no rush when it comes to cancer because it is a long road.

Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway

Shared Decision Making for Breast Cancer Patients

August 4, 2009 erikhom@aol.com Leave a comment

Patient Doctor Consultation with Decision Services Representative on hand

In today’s Wall St. Journal there is an article on the Decision Services offered at my wife’s breast cancer clinic, the Carol Franc Buck Breast Cancer Center at UCSF: http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052970203674704574328570637446770.html#articleTabs%3Darticle

Decision Services is a great resource when you are overwhelmed with all the information and emotions when first diagnosed. At the time I thought nothing of the services. Now that I look back on it, the resources and advice for helping to manage our experience were invaluable:

– My wife and I watched many DVDs, pamphlets and other articles together,
– Prepared countless questions for our visits
– Reviewed stats together
– Went over online research made available to us
– Reviewed our notes of our meetings and prepared follow up questions

In this information age, services like this are so important to have. Patients have so many questions and thoughts running through their head that they sometimes miss what is being said to them, forget to ask the questions that they wanted to ask and feel frustrated and left out. Many times my wife would hear one thing and I would hear another. We’d just review the notes taken by the notetaker and we’d have our discussion resolved. I could even use this in my everyday life.

The service provided interns who took great notes during our visits before, during and after our visits to make sure we understood everything that was said in our visits and to help us get more informed answers from my wife’s doctors. We often submitted laundry lists of questions before each visit and they were prepared with their answers before we came in for each appointment. We all know how we forget what they tell us during those visits because we are so worried, but they provided great notes from our appointments.

Yes, that is my wife featured in the article’s photos.

As we reach the aage of health reform in the US, services like these will become more invaluable as we help put some control back in the care of the patients. There are many early adopters of such services such as the Palo Alto Medical Foundation, The Wellness Community, the Mendocino Cancer Resource Center, Breast Cancer Connections, the Humboldt Community Breast Health Project, and (abroad) the Edinburgh Cancer Centre.

The entire team at the Breast Care Center, led by Laura Esserman, is blazing new trails in health care. Check out https://www.breastcancertrials.org/bct_nation/home.seam and http://www.athenacarenetwork.org/ for other innovations from this group!

Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway

UCSF Breast Cancer Videos

July 27, 2009 erikhom@aol.com Leave a comment

Both my wife’s surgeon, Dr. Shelley Hwang, and her oncologist, Dr. Hope Rugo, are part of the team at UCSF’s Carol Franc Buck Cancer Clinic in San Francisco and have put together a series of videos (Dr. Rugo is also part of Breast Cancer.org’s panel of Medical Experts). The videos are reflective of the care my wife is receiving.

The videos discuss bisphosphonates, Tamoxifen, AI, OS, and DCIS research as well as alternative approaches to care for those who have discovered DCIS.

They are both very interesting or at least can help you in your dialogue with your physician or even your spouse. Sometimes it is hard to communicate to others what is going on and I know I personally found these easier to digest than having an emotional discussion with my own wife and physicians.

One thing you will notice about the demeanor of both physicians is their sense of community with the patient as well as their keen sense for wanting to find both the causes and the cures for this disease. It is my hope they will not only uncover many of the keys to solving breast cancer, but other cancers as well.

– Shelley Hwang on DCIS

– Hope Rugo on New Frontier of Hormone Therapy

Breast Cancer - A Loving Fight, Route 53 - Life is A Highway

Don’t Blink – A Year With Cancer

July 21, 2009 erikhom@aol.com Leave a comment

So I’ve been tryin’ ta slow it down
I’ve been tryin’ ta take it in
In this here today, gone tomorrow world we’re livin’ in

– Kenny Chesney’s Don’t Blink

A year has now passed since that day I walked in and found my wife sitting at the kitchen table and she calmly told me that her doctor had found a lump. You would think that will all of this upheaval that this is the year that could have seemed like it would have taken forever but it hasn’t. While it has been filled with surgeries and hardships, we’ve tried to fill it with other events and highlights to mix it up. The journey was tough but before we knew it we were through a surgery, on to recovery, back in to surgery, more recovery, etc. Three surgeries later and we still have at least one more, but we are moving on.

It is hard to move on though, because we have to respect where we’ve been. As part of our 15th anniversary, we spent some time away and took the time to reflect on the past year. You’d think that in a lifetime that this would be a throwaway year and one that you would want to chalk up as one you sweep under the rug and forget, but we agreed that our love grew for each other and our respect for each other and for ourselves grew as well. When your relationship takes a step forward you don’t throw out that year. So while in some ways the scars are still fresh and the dull aches are right there to remind us of what we’ve been through, the year has gone by some immensely fast. We’ve actually have done quite a lot and accomplshed quite a bit. I think it is because we didn’t procrastinate and sweat the little things. We just went for it even if we had to stretch a little further to get there. That said, time might have flown but we must have aged somehow.

I had to laugh this morning when I went to grab one of those Sunday-Saturday pill boxes to take a Centrum cardio pill. My wife told me I was grabbing the wrong one. I was grabbing the PM pill box and not the AM box. Last year we had no pill boxes and now we have one for AM and for PM! We sure get old and become our parents in a hurry! We had just had this conversation with some old classmates at a 30 year grammar school reunion. We were all complaining of aches and pains (everyone looked pretty good quite frankly) and it turns out several of my classmates also had gone through breast cancer recently. At the same time several others were now in their early forties and still having babies. Amazing. early 40s is not too young to be having breast cancer and still not too old to be having babies. Makes you scratch your head.

Meanwhile the beat goes on. My wife is prepping for another follow up surgery at the end of the summer yet stiill undergoing her monthly examinations and her clinical trial. They found some small indications of early osteoperosis but luckily her clinical trial has her taking medication to increase bone density. This is so crazy what they can find these days.

Speaking of aging I spoke with Dr. Ken Dychtwald, the reknowned gerontologist, today. We were talking about the recent rash of celebrity deaths and he reminded me that in previous generations these people would have died 15-20 years earlier but with the extended lifespan we are all enjoying through the miracles of modern medicine and science that instead of deaths happening ‘in threes” we will be seeing deaths in larger groups. “There are just simply going to be more people dying every day,” he said. I nodded and he smiled and continued, “That is why we live life harder every day. The secret to living longer is to live happier!” That coming from a man who gets remarried to his wife every year. to renew his vows.